boulevard of broken dreams;

2005-02-08T13:47:00.000+08:00

www.ofnospecificsignificance.blogspot.com

2005-01-19T16:24:00.000+08:00

this is hereby my last entry.
finally after procastinating for so long,
i have decided to do it.
probably going to have a new blog.
ask me then;
:)

2005-01-16T21:51:00.000+08:00

the concert was cool.
had fun with the gurlies ;)
thanks again for the chocalates.
pleasant pleasant suprise.
unexpected, shocking. =p
i woldnt mind this kinda punishment, my lord
well, it's the little things that matter ((:
cant say how much it means to me.
cant bear to eat it already. ;x
hehe. soooo nice! =x
hiakhiakhiak. tmr monday again. =/
bahhh.

2005-01-16T16:59:00.000+08:00

Wishlist
.New swim suit;black?
.Havaianas slippers
.School bag
.Off shoulder tee from this shop in Bugis

that's bout it.
haha. boring.

2005-01-15T21:55:00.000+08:00

its a funny thing how i feel about that song.
some lines are just so true, no pun intended.
some are just so cliched.
and some lines are just not gonna happen.

2005-01-15T21:48:00.000+08:00

RYAN CABRERA LYRICS

"True"

I wont talk

I wont breathe

I wont move till you finally see

That you belong with me

You might think I dont look

But deep inside

In the corner of my mind

Im attached to you

Im weak

Its true

Cuz im afraid to know the answer

Do you want me too?

Cuz my heart keeps falling faster

I've waited all my life

To cross this line

To the only thing thats true

So I will not hide

Its time to try

Anything to be with you

All my life I've waited

This is true

You dont know what you do

Everytime you walk into the room

Im afraid to move

Im weak

Its true

Im just scared to know the ending

Do you see me too?

Do you even know u met me?

I've waited all my life to cross this line

To the only thing thats true

So I will not hide

Its time to try anything to be with you

All my life I've waited

This is true

I know when I go ill be on my way to you

The way thats true

I've waited all my life to cross this line

To the only thing thats true

So I will not hide

Its time to try anything to be with you

All my life I've waited

This is true

2005-01-13T22:09:00.000+08:00

just ignore me laaa.
where are we heading to?
absence makes the heart fonder..

or not?

decided against previous post.
not good.
and nothing's getting better.
the more i want to just go ahead and forget,
i cannot.
well, it's obviously ~~not~~ helpful.
miserable you know.
tired like fuck, sch isnt exactly alright.
tuition too.

but at least i've got my friends. =)

helped alil on the taufik placard.
so fun, chasing idols. teehee.
i seriously dont mind.
wonder when i can afford the time.
im supporting everbody now. haha.
as long as you were an idol, can already.
cept a few.
gawd, crap.
dont mind meeting david yeo though ;P
today ate more than i was supposed to.
gotta stop it once and for all.
wish i was suffering from an eating disorder once more.
the fundrasing bazaar is coming too soon.
got a lot to do man.

hai. got pimples popping out again.
stress and the late nights.
trust me, 7 hours of sleep and i swear its still not enough.
got this mysterious scratch too.
i have no idea why. =/

2005-01-11T21:59:00.000+08:00

i think im gonna shut this blog down soon
i was gonna post smth really long.
but i figured just one more chance wouldnt hurt?

2005-01-08T23:01:00.000+08:00

let's just go straight to the point.
bahhh.like that's ever gonna happen.

im frustrated, sad and lonely.
wht a mix.

going for training tmr. i hope my legs can take it.
chocolates are just so tempting.

this is rubbish la.
been doing homework
gotta study bio tomorrow.

insulted? got a right to be?
i really dont get you.
the way you phrase stuff aint exactly the nicest.
cant quite place it in words.
it just stings/stinks.
both la.

some people are just so lucky.
its really not my day.. everyday.

nvm, tmr will be a better day right?
yeea right.

2005-01-07T23:52:00.000+08:00

kfh gone
sleep somemore.

2005-01-07T23:32:00.000+08:00

shun me like the plague
avoid,
what is it?
invisbility

it could help if i knew.

2005-01-07T13:28:00.000+08:00

i guess it must be me..
i mean im like at home alone and everyone esle is with somebody.
kinda pathetic dont you think.
i seriously dont know how to ask,
can i go your house too?
maybe i should just sleep and
while im at it, just die in my sleep.
maybe it just didnt occur to you guys how alone i am.
yup. SLEEP

2005-01-06T22:40:00.000+08:00

i am just so scared it would fade away...

2005-01-06T22:01:00.000+08:00

it's been awhile since i blogged.
at least it feels that way.
i dont know if there's something wrong with me or not.
i dont understand why cant we be like last time.
i really do enjoy the times spent with you guys.
but sometimes, i really feel very outcasted.
i dont understand why you can just walk away in the midst of my question?
maybe cos you didnt wanna be left out?
or it just didnt bother you that i was even there?
maybe it just wasnt important yeah.
nvm, i shall just overlook it.
i mean its no big deal.
the councillors would have to do duty and stuff.
understand, but just hello and bye? and wht esle?
nvm, its not that a big deal too. its a responsibility.
you guys can just talk to your own kind. and i shall just ~~rot~~
the other two might just pair up and leave without me.
i just they forget. or didnt wanna disturb me.
well, im willingly gonna let myself be disturbed.
i really dont mind...
i dont know how to tell this to you face to face.
its impossible.
i dont know what's wrong with me la.
it must be me.
im trying so hard you know,
to fit in. to try to talk.
nth seems to work.
it just feels so o u t for me.
i felt like telling you guys actually.
but there was nth wrong among you guys.
it was just me.
i dont wanna like get everyone involved.
soo its kinda pointless to say anything at all.
but i really gotta say it somehow.
i feel like telling this to you, yes you.
but i somehow nvr managed to put all this in words across.
i want so much for something to come out of it.
i guess high expectations hurt afterall.
maybe we're just too busy
maybe there's just no time
maybe...
maybe you werent even interested at all.

2005-01-04T15:07:00.000+08:00

i am secretly updating my blog again.
second day was... bad.
i dont quite know how to place it in words.
i am so craving chocolate. =/
stupid headache
stupid tuition.

2005-01-03T15:03:00.000+08:00

and btw i listened in class!
like more than ever.
feel so good? =x hah.

2005-01-03T14:58:00.000+08:00

school was alright.
ho hum
just feeling very neutral bout it all.
like excited, see all these people in uniform
like scared cos it seems like i really have to buck up.
and...
i dont know.
it makes a difference la.

hm. there's also a lot of tests going on.
bio, social studies.
ss got two?! blahh. okok.

2005-01-02T17:01:00.000+08:00

mum was trying to get us up at 7 this morning.
she claimed it was to get us used to waking up early for next week,
technically.. tmr?
supposed to meet up with some of my sister's friends for basketball
but the rain...
it was cancelled thereafter.
did maths
bahh, i remembered very very little of all the work.
i must have got the worst memory ever when it comes to homework.
studied bio too.
think there's gonna be a test.
wanted very badly to eat chocolate.
there was none in my house. =/
just feel really lazy.
hey, im trying already ok? =x
i dont know what to expect tomorrow.
meeting some classmates which i did not see for like the entire holiday?
my teachers?!!
eeks, who is my form teacher gonna be?
hope he/she doesnt demand too much from this VC
haha.in a pretty floaty mood.
dont think i cant blog as often when the term begins.
=/ normal la. oh well, look ahead.
one more YEAR only. =/ haha. ok

2005-01-01T20:59:00.000+08:00

its 2005
not much of a difference except im starting to panic, worry
bout you bout the future in dmn bout friends.
i dont know laaa.
tummyachee =/

2005-01-01T01:04:00.000+08:00

HAPPY ~~HAPPY~~ NEW YEAR! ((:

2004-12-31T23:54:00.000+08:00

seasonal bejeweled
bejeweled
bejeweled2
spongebobsquarepants 3d odessy smth
haha. all the lame games i play to pass time? haha.
omg.3 more minutes? bish bish bish.

2004-12-31T23:18:00.000+08:00

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when you're down

To feel like you've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save you

No you don't know what it's like

Do you wanna be somebody else?

Are you sick of feeling so left out?

Are you desperate to find something more?

Before your life is over

Are you stuck inside a world you hate?

Are you sick of everyone around?

With their big fake smiles and stupid lies

While deep inside you're bleeding

Are you ready kids?

I said are you ready?

who lives in a pineppple under the sea

Spongebob SquarePants

Absorbent and yellow and porous is he

Spongebob Squarepants

If nautical nonsence be something you wish

Spongebob Squarepants

Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish

Spongebob Squarepants

Spongebob squarepants

Spongebob squarepants!

2004-12-31T21:59:00.000+08:00

I am going to spend me New Year hating everything.
Am I?

2004-12-31T21:33:00.000+08:00

Maybe he's doing the same thing as me.. maybe he wants so bad to call me, but just won't because I haven't called him... then again, maybe I shouldn't fill myself with false hope that he might just be missing me like I'm missing him...

2004-12-31T20:34:00.000+08:00

ifthere'ssomethingswhichiwannadoiwouldwannapickupsomerustybladeandslashtheotherpackstuffandrunouttahomeanddiehalfwaouttapainandguiltnotbadehwhyyoubothertoreaditsfuckingsickeningcosijustcantell

2004-12-31T20:26:00.000+08:00

i a m s o n o t e n j o y i n g
d i e
f u c k n e w y e a r e v e . ( :

2004-12-31T18:36:00.000+08:00

It's new year's eve.
And guess what?
I am stuck at home with my mother,
and i have nothing to do.
Stupid arrangements of going to the park are dashed,
obviously because of the rain which doesn't seem to want to stop.
It rains and stops... then rains again and stop
And it goes on. What the hell am i supposed to do?
Today was basically wake up, tv, eat, sleep, wake up, eat, computer.
I HATE EVERYTHING.
People are probably out enjoying and I'm like doomed at home.
I want to go out but to where?!
In another few hours time, it's going to be 2005.
Like that's very interesting when you are stuck at home with your mother.
Nagging Nagging Nagging.
I spent Christmas Eve sulking at home and now this,
Next year is just not going to be good at all huh.
What is all this shit.
This is all so pathetic, laugh all you want.
~~haha. you dont even bother to reply. oh,bcos i told you to.~~

2004-12-31T10:40:00.000+08:00

perfect equilibrium;
Guess what's the irony?
I cant fucken dance to save my life ((:
I am up this morning all bright and early and I have absolutely nothing better to do.
It's rainy and it's causing me to get all gloomy and upset, on new year's eve.
Rrrright.
Somebody strangle me.

2004-12-31T01:40:00.000+08:00

i feel so constricted.
literally.
breatheless, dont know why.
i miss you more than ever.
~~i cant help myself~~
tell me when to give up ok?

2004-12-31T01:35:00.000+08:00

Tragedy often brings out the best in nations.
And we are witnessing one of those rare moments now.

2004-12-30T22:01:00.000+08:00

ok. i'll be partying tmr at pasir ris park tmr.
if tmr, nth's on.
would wanna go watch kfh, alone?
hurhur. or maybe meet the fockers
provided i can pass
then i wanna get drunk
and i wanna dance with like several hundred people.
you know wht's the problem
i cant really dance.
oh wht the heck.
~~i feel sad haha~~

2004-12-30T21:48:00.000+08:00

in another 26 hours,
it'll be 2005
would i get an answer?
no pressure of course,
it would be an added bonus :)
seriously.
i dont know what to feel.
i am at a lost.
i really feel so strongly bout us.
but yet, i am still so helpless and lost about it.
i really am begining to wonder
if it was all wishful thinking on my part.

2004-12-30T17:39:00.000+08:00

i wanna gooooooooooo
i really wanna goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
BLAH. rubbish.
im an extra
like that's gonna make me feel better.

2004-12-30T17:08:00.000+08:00

im frigging upset. =/
im frigging upset. =/
im frigging upset. =/
im frigging upset. =/
im frigging upset. =/
im frigging upset. =/
SOBS T_T
yikes. shitty shitty shitty shitty shit.
looks like i'll never get the answer bfore 05
that's horrible.
ARGH. bleah.
i do and i dont wanna go to that bbq. =/
im confusing. right. have fun.

2004-12-30T13:17:00.000+08:00

omg. wht have i gotten myself into. omg omg. =/
akward? i hope not! kk. pray hard.

2004-12-29T22:10:00.000+08:00

hehe.
i am tired.
my tummy aches from laughing.
my legs aches from walking
and my head aches for no apparent reason.
hurhur =x
i had fun though.
hai, jealous of my cousin and her bf.
haha. oh well, looking forward to the bbq and ice skating!!
omg. im sucha a freak.
haha. bought spongebob squarepants boxers.
i am sooo proud of it.
its soooo cute.
haha =D
im soooo happy because of that actually.
aint i an easily excitedable nut.
wht kinda word is excitedable?! omg
ate yami yoghurt. YUMMY! i mean it.
omg. i cant stop omg-ing.
bought these really unique pendants too. glass and pictures.
got mr condom wan. =x oh dear. ahah.
okok. enough rubbish
if you're looking at this, i miss YOU! =x
haha. can tell im really high now. lalalalala.
ohh. buyin my jeans tmr too. i want levis =x
dream on. ahah. okok. =)

2004-12-28T22:23:00.000+08:00

i suddenly feel like dancing.
oh my god.
what's wrong with me.
i cant dance for nuts and i suddenly feel like squeezing with like 10000 ppl
and grooving to the beats. =x
dear me, wht's up man.

2004-12-28T21:34:00.000+08:00

yeah!
might be free on new year's eve.
quick date mee =x haha.
please offer a prayer for the victims of the tsunamis and earthquake. =/
hai. okay. miss you ;)

2004-12-28T14:01:00.000+08:00

yikes. tuition.is fucked up
selfish people. darn new year's eve. ( people,make plans!)
wonder if i can excuse myself. lonely.
rubbish.eat. fat.
irritating. kung fu hustle.
msn cocked up. heartache.
~~stupid blog~~

2004-12-28T13:57:00.000+08:00

T_T
might have to spend new year's eve with my extended family!!
which involves like dont know how many crazy,noisy cousins
and their even LOUDER parents.
oh boy. i think the only nice thing would be that we will be seeing fireworks on top of mt faber
how nice.. =/
wht an ambience
jus tht i dun wanna spend it tht way.golly.gawd.thought maybe we could... =/

2004-12-27T18:56:00.000+08:00

i just hate it when parents give their i-am-always-right speech
because half the time they're speaking gibberish.
take my mum for example.
she's rubbish at times
she talks as if she knows
which in actual fact is indeed a fact
a very distorted and vague fact that doesnt neccessarily have to make sense
well, i guess this doesnt bother them.
why? because they're never wrong.
they dont like to admit they're wrong.
they like to think they're right
why?
one, because as parents they ahve the authority to.
two, because they dont want us to do this or do that.
three, just because they are our PARENTS.
you see. they concieved us, gave live to us, raise us
and they think they know everything.
i always tell myself how dumb they can be when they say this infamous line.
"i can see through your every action
you think we dont know but we know."
oh please, give me a break.
i really dont like the way you handle me and ginny.
goddamnit. =/
i hate ur obnoxious ways.
i hate the way you try to talk to us.
it doesnt work.
i wish i could tell you all this.
oh well.
wht a damn dinner.

2004-12-27T14:19:00.000+08:00

You've got some deep rumblings going on down below the surface. It's all good in the long run, but for now, get used to a short period of confusion.

2004-12-27T14:16:00.000+08:00

i wanna eat till i get FATfatfat.
haha. and feel miserably horrible and digusting.
i dont feel good. =)

2004-12-26T21:56:00.000+08:00

just watched this show
blast from the past;
starring brendan fraser and alicia silverstone
a nice touching movie?
hm. as from pris's blog.
fuckingly filled with thoughts today.
everything seem to go against me.
firstly my horrible tummy aches.
been feeling funny. bahh.
then i dont know why i keep feeling hungry too.
shit. kept eating?
blahh. wanted to study or revise or at least do some work?
cldnt manage to man.
i am just sick of it.
the piles of books lying at home.
damnit =/
i have clean forgotten everything.
add maths to bio to social studies (for god's sake)
you can put a gun next to my head and i still wouldnt be able to
tell you wth is inertia? spelling?
blahh. really clueless.
ARGHHHHHH.
tummyacheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

2004-12-26T15:19:00.000+08:00

have we lost it all?

2004-12-25T21:57:00.000+08:00

i would like to go to that dinner too. =/
its not like i dont want yup?
another time?

christmas is gonna be overrrr.

2004-12-24T22:51:00.000+08:00

all i want for christmas is you* ;)

2004-12-24T22:12:00.000+08:00

went to school to sell books today.
think i served less than 10 people today.
it was just boring sitting down there like idiots for like half an hour.
we still got paid though.
hm. had this really crazy thing that we should go ice skating.
since it was christmas and ice skating seems like such a 'christmas-y' event.
hehe. we took a long long long train ride which really didnt feel that long
i guess it was because we were talking and it was not BORING. =D
hehe. reached jurong centre? is it that place? im not sure.
bought mac then realised no outside food is to be brought in.
hid everything in our bags and headed off.
found lockers to put our stuff and this is where the funny shit begans.
yanling and i began speed eating.
we were like chomping and swallowing at top speed.
it was gross thinking bout it.
got our skates thereafter and went into the ring (or rink? hmmm)
i was abit TOO scared in the beginning.
panic laaaa. =x
i was afraid of falling,
not because of being embarassed or what.
it's just this dumb phobia.
liting and michelle seemed to get the hang of it soooo easily.
yanling no need to say la. pro =p
hehe. so i was jus hanging on to my dear life on the sides. haha.
then michelle saved my sorry ass! =p
she held my hand and very very patiently lead me on several rounds
she prompted me to leave the side and continue.
i dont know how far i can go without her man.
her patience is amazing!! haha. =)
i fell down thrice altogether today. haha.
not bad considering i have absolutely no sense of balance. teehee.
haha. i think i can skate without help ler bah?
haha.
the cons, got blister and skin abrasions.
due to the friction!
dear me, horrible. ahha.
but FUN.
i think im addicted =x
haha. oh well,
waht a christmas eve.
meet the fockers in nc16?!!!
=/ blahh. okay.

2004-12-23T22:40:00.000+08:00

ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
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ROT
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ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
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ROT
ROT
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ROT
ROT
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ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
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ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
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ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROTROT
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ROT
ROT
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ROT
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ROT
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ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROT
ROTTEN

2004-12-23T22:21:00.000+08:00

christmas never sucked so much.
on the eve, i supposedly cant go out.
cause my mum's alone at home.
then my sis can go enjoy some xmas play and dinner?
my dad dissapears too. =)
i dont even mind goin out to eat myself man.
WORSE
on xmas itself, going to some lame reservoir.
to check out smth new
oh like i care. i dont.
i rather sleep
FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK.
what kind of christmas is that?
on top of all that,

forget it. its the seaon to be crying
and getting pissed off
and feeling like smth's wrong
and making sure no one notices you
and to rot and die at home
and to behave like a bitch
and to allow ppl to look straight through me
and for parents to make stupid arrangements
why.. i wonder what can go wrong?
i shall just gorge myself and bitch about how fat i look.
YAY!

2004-12-23T15:54:00.000+08:00

i swear i am fat
just ate a entire box of chocolates. =/
thanks michello btw.
but i whole big box.
not a small box lehh.
dieee laa. =/
forget it.
the temptation will always be there.
haha. worked like siao for three hours this morning
it was really crazy
might not be as chaotic as imagined but tiring.
went xmas shopping too.
quite fun actually.
im fat im fat im fat =)
i know the gift sucked. =/

2004-12-22T20:52:00.000+08:00

i am going sleep early today.
so as not to make stupid mistakes tomorrow.
haha. gonna sell books to the future generation of dunmanites.
as corny as it sounds,
i dont wanna make a booboo. =x
haha. cannot kan cheong, panick
gotta learn how to use some reciept printing calculator.
i know la, sounds easy. =/
i hope soo. so how?
mac breakfast tmr? hehe.

2004-12-22T17:00:00.000+08:00

okayy.
i dont know how to react la.
i was shocked that u are so shocked.
haha. oh well,
i wld have probably embarrassed the shit outta myself.
nvm. i hope i got the right brownies though.

i suck.

2004-12-21T23:40:00.000+08:00

2004-12-21T23:33:00.000+08:00

进退两难 ;
i dont know what to do. =/

blah. meet the fockers anyone? hehe.

2004-12-19T01:43:00.000+08:00

i am beginning to get frealed out now. =/
eeks.

2004-12-19T01:30:00.000+08:00

tiring tiring tiring
shopped the whole day.
i gotta stop gorging on food.
i cant fit into L, and not exactly into M
im outta shape. =/
bought my shoes, finally.
got that billabong skirt too.
yipees. hehe. i just cant wait man. =x
tomorrow's the choir concert. cool cool.
ermm, walked around queenstown and tampines today.
took an entire dayy.
we must really haven been slow.
i sometimes just get really frustrated.
the feeling comes and go and i really cant come to terms with it.
haha. that explains it. =/ haha. i've gone bonkers.
sighh. okok.

2004-12-19T01:09:00.000+08:00

you* ;)

2004-12-17T23:21:00.000+08:00

i wished today never ended.
dreaming me. hmm.
it was fun, fun FUN!
thanks again! ;)

2004-12-16T16:46:00.000+08:00

com crashed.
past few days alrights la.
i forget what to blog already.
im just really dont know what to expect :)
oh well, xmas is coming.

2004-12-13T01:48:00.000+08:00

i feel like i've missed out alot.
i feel like crying again.
omg. i am emotional.
i know why i get so cranky already.
my mum and dad BOTH has the same problems.
short fuse? hm. not quite.
i dont quite know how to explain.
maybe she is hindering you :/
im still not good enough :(

2004-12-13T01:12:00.000+08:00

im back!
ahha. right. big deal.
im just glad im home.
travelled 881 km in the past four days.
how cool is that? haha.
im glad that im a singaporean too.
i just cannot get used to the environment in kl.
they have traffic lights, but they dont really use them
cars dont stop and people just cross the road
i was inches close to a moving car like a dozen times
haha.thank god im still in one piece.
im a very irresponsible kiddo. =/
i left 3 other teens? tweens? in a shopping mall.
i feel like dying la. =/ forget that.
im fat now. haha. as always.
did nth but eat shop eat shop eat shop.=p
got my nike sports bra! haha.
im one happy girl.
got an emily wallet too. =D
hm. not much clothes and wht not.
hm. busy busy busy.
tmr got bbq
then going to stay over at yanling's house? hehe.
edge of reason! =)
i miss you soooo!

2004-12-08T21:19:00.000+08:00

got friendly today. =/
alrights la.
i dont know why had alot to blog jus now.
the moment i get to it,
im at a loss for words.
i dont know what to say already la. =/

2004-12-07T22:38:00.000+08:00

now that its over,
i got to agree its a load off my shoulders.
but now im wondering if we could have done better =/
haha. maybe we could have found better gifts and prizes if we looked hard enough.. hm. ehh. whatever =x
had training today,
i dont know if it was me being over sensitive or what but i wasnt really welcome.
hmm. whispering and talking and stuff.
haha. what is coming over me?
feeling abit sick.
find it exceptionally difficult to concentrate on doing things today.
forgot alot of things and did thinkgs halfway etc.
ohh boy.i really gotta snap outta this. tmr got friendly with haising.
they're good leh. worried worried worried
crystal's not in sgp too,
say i'll probably be playing. confirm cannot make it.=/
eeks. going to malaysia for a short trip on thursday i think.
im just lookin forward to buying stuff. =P
im crap. im not looking forward to anything leh.
enough rubbish for today.
i hope you find the pic soon cc :D
hm. suddenly remembered this particular commercial
some camera or videocam commercial brand; i forget.
there was this one line in the commercial that struck me.
it takes 3 seconds to fall in love, and 3 decades to get along.
how true is that? i dont know ;)

2004-12-07T01:41:00.000+08:00

"Lost For Words"
If I can't find the words...
Waiting for this feeling
That I'm drowning in to subside
You make me swim like a beginner
Like I'm new at life
All these words don't come easy
No they always seem to stop
There is awkward silence yeah
Anytime we talk
Oh but I wanna let it in
I wanna ease all your doubts
I keep trying to get it out
But if I can't find the words
To tell you what
I'm feeling Baby that don't mean
It don't mean that I don't feel it
I'm trying to tell you girl
But if you don't believe just look and see
My face says what you mean to me
When I can't find the words
I know I can send you flowers
To try to make my feelings clear
And girl I could hold you tight for hours
I wanna tell you what you're trying to hear
Oh and I wanna let it in
I wanna ease all your doubts
I keep trying to get it out
But if I can't find the words
To tell you what I'm feeling
Baby that don't mean
It don't mean that I don't feel it
I'm trying to tell you girl
But if you don't believe just look and see
My face says what you mean to me
When I can't find the words
But I know sometimes I leave you so upset
Cos I got all these bits and pieces in my head
I know because I let you struggle with the things
I haven't said
When I can't find the words
When I can't find the words
When I, when I, when I can't find the words
I wanna ease all your doubts
I keep trying to get it out
But if I can't find the words
To tell you what I'm feeling
But baby that don't mean
It don't mean that I don't feel it
I'm trying to tell you girl
But if you don't believe just look and see
My smile says what you mean to me
When I can't find the words
If I can't find the words

2004-12-07T01:17:00.000+08:00

tonight's the prom
in fact, tonight was the prom.
its over.
i dont know if that's a good thing or what you know.
it's a good thing cos you guys have graduated & can now proceed on to the greater things in life.
it's a bad thing cos you are leaving the school. forever..
argh. so melodramatic. =/
but that feeling of you just leaving is freaking ..
nvm. enough rambling on.
went there at bout 5.30
prepared all the gifts
gave all change and recipts to bernard.
organised ourselves and we were ready to roll.
our first dunmanites were 4f ppl i think. ahah . not impt.
erm. after that it was a mad rush.
people were streaming in at irregular intervals and we were almost shorthanded.
i think the best period of time where we could actually handle everyone was whenn..
the 5a and 5b guys came.
i messed things up alil now and then.
thank goodnes it was nth too serious.
all within control.
then it was dinnertime.
we sat outside the hall
looking and smeeling the food and the aroma.
dang, we cldnt eat laaa. ugh.
did some lucky draw thingy.
didnt realise i had to go on stage. haha.
now that was embaraasing.
i mean, me on stage? i rather die. =/
that passed quickly enough.
then came prom king and queen.
was pretty suprised by some nominees
good suprises ;D
it was fun. the mc was not bad.
he got the crowd cheering and stamping and makin' noise!
tht really made the atmosphere.
belinda was crowned prom queen.
that is so cool.
haha. =x
she's hot,
i dont think anyone can not agree with me.
then was the dancing and boogie-ing.
b-orring. blah. we jus had nth to do.
i was getting upset.
i tried not to think bout it.
i grew desperate la. =/ blah.
forget it. waited like darn long for my dad to arrive.
wahh. so paiseh lor. everyone was like smiling and posing for pictures and talking.
i felt like dissapearing.
i jest felt like crying too. beats me.=/
took a photo :D
if only there were lesser people milling around.
i wld have liked to returned what i owned you.
blah. dont know wht im trying to talk about. =p
oh well, i have made up my mind.
i shall just go on with it :)
lalaa. imu*
it's the small things that matter :)

2004-12-05T23:19:00.000+08:00

all of a sudden, im feeling all emotional and sad.
over what? i cant quite put into words.
there's another bout 3 weeks? before school starts.
that is actually a really short time.
i ~~cant~~ wait. bah
packed everything i guess.
hopefully i didnt miss anything out.
i cannot imagine how school will be like
i cannot imagine life being hectic the wholeee way.ahh-
i really dont know what the hell is going on.

2004-12-05T19:22:00.000+08:00

did stuff for like the whole day
am fricking tired. =/
it's ugly too. =/
tomorrow is one big mess
i dont know who to meet and what time and i got alot of things to transport over
worse is the attire i guess. =(
its too ladyyyy! i cant stand it.
haha. darn. =/ haha. gonna look like an idiot.
blah. forget bout that. hai. i keep thinking
over and over again.
i just dont figure it out. sobs.
zz. blog later?
bahh. miss you :)

2004-12-05T01:03:00.000+08:00

i feel like crying
i am curious but i cant ask
i am ___ but i cant show
i dont quite know how to cope with the situation.
i guess i would guess have to.
tanned alil. pimpiles are popping out.
that is irritating. wait until after monday alrights! haha =x
finally found all that i needed to buy.
all that is needed now, is alil bit of time
and a whole load of work. =)
tomorrow shall be the day i cut and paste.
cant wait to see the outcome. excited excited. =p
went around town today looking.
it was sold out everywhere. had to go to those kind of
old textile shops. haha. =/ got lost along the way.
so dumb la. wandering around those shophouses.
had one of those horrible 'singsong' karaoke dinners
2-3 hours of non stop crooning of various oldies.
yikes. there was this man, not part of the usual group
he started shouting song lyrics into the mic. =/
it was horrible for the eyes and the ears.
think he was drunk. ho hum.
dont get pissed with me la. wht did i doo. =/
might be changin phone
i want a decent camera phone =p
crap laa. bth already.
;(

2004-12-02T22:56:00.000+08:00

was really bored

thus decided to change the layout yet again

had been thinking of something plain and simple

not exactly like this,

but close enough.

blogger was down yesterday.

at least when i tried. ugh. horrible.

today was another one of those days.

went tanning, only had an hour of sun

i think i did turn dark.

like one pathetic shade.

haha. there's always another day.

the erm, reception lady?

asked me to swim with her and her colleagues tomorrow morning.

like omg?! haha. see how bah. early morninggg. =/

went home and just spent the whole day being pissed

no thanks to my sis.

being the spoilt brat she is,

couldnt stop finding fault with me.

so darn selfish too. shit man.

slept, dilly-dallied around.

it was one of those boring boring days.

i find so kiddy all of a sudden you know.

i cant quite figure why.

gonna have training tmr. will be going out to get clothes thereafter!

haha. yipee. =x

you*

2004-11-30T22:17:00.000+08:00

It's been two days and I'm missin' you already
Never really thought you could mean
So much in such a little time
Think about the nights when I'm lyin' in your bed
With my chest resting your head
Now that you're gone
I'm here to stay
I think I'm fallin' down.
Down down down
With a bad case of love.
Love love love
I think I'm falling for you.
You you you
I think, I'm falling in love
When you come back all I wanna do is hold you
Have a blast even though there's nothing to do
Hold you close and look you in the eyes
So just come back and I'll tell you how I feel
Never knew how easy you could steal
My heart I miss you come home soon
I think, I'm fallin' in love
I think, I'm fallin' in love
Cause I know that you won't be home when I call you
You're in England now, I hope that you'll be home soon
Cause I know that you won't be there when I call you, NOW
I think, I'm fallin' in love
I think, I'm fallin' in love :)

2004-11-30T21:45:00.000+08:00

continued..
haziq asked me to stop blogging.
haha. anyway,
i hope i can do wht i've set up to do.
ohh, plus joggings n the park and stuff
that would help me lose weight.
i keep eating nowadays.
non stop. haha.
binging when i am sad occurs alot.
now its time to think positive and not eat soo much.
haha. okay. having tuition tmr.
then maybe go indoodr stadium? or maybe to play pool.
hm. i dont know la. no one told me anything yet.
hm. i gotta confirm soon.
i know you care; i hope im right ;)

2004-11-30T21:15:00.000+08:00

i feel so liberated.
i dont exactly know why.
boss and company are starting to play pool!
i cant wait to learn it man.
it's going to be soooo fun.
at least i can imagine..
this idiot typing here would probably suck at it but heyy, for the fun of it ok?
haha. had training.
my legs were extremely tired and was aching throughout the trainings.
arghh. not fun.
i love playing doubles. haha.
it feels more comfortable =)
i just loveee it. okayy.
enough of this.
hm. collected the stuff at the tailors.
the sash is sooo nicee..
haha. cool =x
okay. here's the plan for this 2 weeks.
-tanning; preferably twice =p haha
-shopping
-go liting's house
-trainings
-bbq stuff
-pool! =x
-movie?
haha. i nvr get to watch movie wan leh.
so irritating.
i still find jackjack so appealing. =p
haha. ok

2004-11-30T01:09:00.000+08:00

just a short entry
i screamed like a fucktard in the toilet,
my throat hurts and i still ate chocs.
i love the chijmes hall.
i can almost imagine people dancing in it.
it's one of the romantic places around.
have fun at the bbq.
laughed, played with extra ice..
haha. crap.
good luck for your thingy tmr.
promoting your product or smth ;)

2004-11-28T23:26:00.000+08:00

im like waiting for your msg?
i'll be lucky if i get one.
sighhs. i dont feel like myself

2004-11-27T23:29:00.000+08:00

i am beat.
i tried being nonchalent; that turned out bad
woke up on the wrong side of the bed today
i tried feigning ignorance
that turned out bad.i was consistently upset and moody
i couldnt tolerate it and tried even harder in the end
was pissed and irritatable in the morning.
i tried being patient
i didnt get enough sleep.
i guess that is what is most effective to date.
went to white sands.
are u are just too caught up with yourself
that opened a whole new perspective to me.
or are these just hints to tell me to go away?
okayy.went home
i really cannot tell.
slacked. then headed to the bbq ler.
jus feel so strange, so alone sometimes.
dont know if it was the atmosphere or what, but i feel very relaxed when im at the erm. rooftop?
what about all those things you had said?
before that was feeling tense and wanted to brawl my eyes out every few minutes.

i dont think that was important.

gonna hve training tomorrow.

then nth already. maybe then i can catch up on my sleep.

i cant believe im having eyebags on holidays.

its dark, big, black and OBVIOUS. eeks.
i miss you more than ever
sighhs.

2004-11-26T22:00:00.000+08:00

maybe i just think too much la
i let small matters affect me too easily.
i make a mountain out of a molehill
i am jealous, petty, and over-sensitive.
i am over-reactive, lame and dumb.
i am loud, crappy and noisy
i make too many insensitive comments.
i talk without thinking
i dont know how to make conversation
i am anti social.
i like to beat around the bush.
i try to be nice but i fail always.
im too paranoid, too crazy, too insane.
i just dont think straight.
shit;

2004-11-26T20:44:00.000+08:00

i daresay today was a good day.
one of the best i've ever had this holidays.
i woke up this morning, feeling lousy as ever.
went for tuition thereafter.
i realised i really cannot do vectors.
i needed alot of time and it was tiring.
i cannot imagine amaths vectors then.
which i will be doing soon after i guess.
mr siow's the best tutor i ever had.
he makes us laugh, yet we're intimidated by him *at least i am* =x
he knows maths at his fingertips.
i admire him.
anyways, went home.
cooked, ate.went out.
passed yvonne the carefour voucher.
she wanted to use it to buy the food and utensils and things needed for the 3C bbq on monday
i am just going there to eat.
probably wander off somewhere that night.
it's so nice to be in the beach at night you know.
hm. anyways. went to safra.
thought that i might be late but hey!
guess what, kwek forgot to book the courts for today.
had to wait for bout an hour before any courts were avaliable.
get what i mean now by giving in soo little,
yet expecting so much in return.
then again, she might be busy with some project what not.
so we're very free la?
the C girls are officially in charge finding a caterer and such things.
thank goodness.
they would just have plan and confirm with us.
to a certain extent, the dirty work is done by them
but hey, hazel said she'll prove it to us. hehe.
coach is being very generous again
he is willing to give $200.
ohh. by the way.
the line up is back to square one,
he decided that liting has improved alot,
and that they can play well together now.
cool. so now, i'm playing with liling.
man, the feeling of playing doubles is still the best.
i hope this remains.
i'm sure we can work something out.
okayy. i am not sure how i actually feel
but its more or less like a bloody outcast.
nevermind, look on the brighter side.
i shouldnt give up halfway
or all my previous efforts would go to waste.
keeping my cool isnt something i do best.
okok. take deep breaths.sighh
they came over to pass me the bbq items.
marinated the chicken wings. hehhe. it was disgusting =x
haha. nvm. fun too. squishy. haha =P gross
got so many bbq. im gonna get fat fat fat.
no one's gonna want me then. haha. =/ that sucks.
haha. oh well, i shant start talking rubbish.
erm. cant wait to start the preparation for the prom.
it's gonna be so fun.
not forgetting hectic. haaha.
its been so long. i am clueless where to go next.
maybe it wasnt even supposed to be.
enlighten me.

2004-11-26T13:33:00.000+08:00

"These Words"
Threw some chords together
The combination D-E-F
Is who I am, is what I do
No one's gonna lay it down for you
Try to focus my attention
But I feel so A-D-D
I need some help, some inspiration
But it's not coming easily
Whoah oh
Trying to find the magic
Trying to write a classic
Don't you know, dont you know, dont you k
now?Waste-bin full of paper
Clever rhymes, see you later
These words are my own
From my heart flown
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There's no other way
To better say
I love you, I love you...
Read some Byron, Shelly and Keats
Recited it over a Hip-Hop beat
I'm having trouble saying what I mean
With dead poets and drum machines
I know I had some studio time booked
But I couldn't find a killer hoo
kNow youve gone & raised the bar right u
pNothing I write is ever good enough
These words are my own
From my heart flown
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There's no other way
To better say
I love you, I love you
I'm getting off my stag
eThe curtains pull away
No hyperbole to hide behind
My naked soul exposes
Whoah.. oh.. oh.. oh..
Whoah.. oh..
Trying to find the magic
Trying to write a classic
Waste-bin full of paper
Clever rhymes, see you later
These words are my own
From my heart flownI love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There's no other way
To better sayI love you...
I love you, is that okay?

2004-11-24T21:24:00.000+08:00

today is another tiring day
let's see.
woke up early, went to school
it's finally the tea party.
was frealing seeing all the graduating people.
time really flies.
anyways, the food looked really good.
especially the sushi
was it good?
did not have a chance to sample it?
hehe. okay.
the most infuriating thing was that the screen blocked the banner the whole time
that was irritating. =/
haha. oh well, left earlier to meet the girlies.
walked around looking for clothes.
hm. saw nice dresses
but i dont have the figure to wear?
too fat, flabby and short. =)
okay. nvm..
legs are really tired after walking.
i also dont quite know why.
i believe there are many explanations.
it just cannot be based on facts.
i dont understand how evil/cruel the human mind can be?
it's selfish and that doesnt cross borders.
yes, no one is perfect.
evryone has their own flaws.
come from a distant land
where maybe thoughts differ
minds wander
nothing is in common.
misunderstandings rife
wavelengths intersect.
i speak but no one hears
my pleas.
sighh. forget it. ermm.
MY SISTER SCORED 241 FOR HER PSLE!!
that is sooo not normal. yes, im jealous. =p
rightt. i am proud of her =)
hm. went to airport to send my aunt off.
she's going to indonesia to work.
wldnt be back for new year even.
i think bout last night?
and i really dont know wht to say.
life is really made of highs and lows.
i really dont know how.
okay. shldnt think bout that.
ermm..im just here.
i wish...
wake up.
i should just wake up and stop dreamin
jsutnotwrtohit

2004-11-24T13:29:00.000+08:00

I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED ALL MY MSGES IN MY INBOX AGAIN
I CANT BELIEVE THIS =/

2004-11-23T23:36:00.000+08:00

August
Loves to joke.
Attractive.
Suave and caring.
Brave and fearless.
Firm and has leadership qualities.
Knows how to console others.
Too generous and egoistic.
Takes high pride of oneself.
Thirsty for praises.
Extraordinary spirit.
Easily angered.
Angry when provoked.
Easily jealous.
Observant.
Careful and cautious.
Thinks quickly.
Independent thoughts.
Loves to lead and to be led.
Loves to dream.
Talented in the arts, music and defense.
Sensitive but not petty.
Poor resistance against illnesses.
Learns to relax.
Hasty and trusty.
Romantic.
Loving and caring.
Loves to make friend

; for the AUGUST babiess ;]

2004-11-23T21:48:00.000+08:00

ehh.
remember the cd cover that we saw in hmv?
it was quite long along?
the cover that looked like some demented kid scribbling on foolscap?
haha. i read bout it recently somewhere..
in life ?
cant remeber but the name of the band is the cure.
they've been around for like a quarter of the century?
alternative rock? quite listener friendly i think?
haha. why am i even bloggin bout that..
ermm.today is probably like the first time i skip training.
had to stay behind to do the banner instead.
my first attempt.
very weak and pathetic
and lastly, ugly. haha. flimsy.
hai. my first and last?
ermm. stayed in sch almost the whole day.
head was literally spinning at the end of the day.
felt very giddy. =/
waited for parents then went to eat at uncle louis.
haha <.<>
think mum was in a good mood today. teehee.
i love spotlight.
i love toufu =x

"Labyrinth"
Say it's the same sun spinning in the same sky
Say it's the same stars streaming in the same night
Tell me it's the same world whirling through the same space
Tell me it's the same time tripping through the same day
So say it's the same house and nothing in the house has changed
Yeah say it's the same room and nothing in the room is strange
Oh tell me it's the same boy burning in the same bed
Tell me it's the same blood breaking in the same head
Say it's the same taste taking down the same kiss
Say it's the same you
Say it's the same you and it's always been like this
Say it's the same you
Say it's the same you and it always and forever is
Say it's the same you
Say it's the same you and it's always been like this
Say it's the same you
Say it's the same you and it always and forever is
Say it's the same you
Say it's the same you
Yeah tell me it's all the same
This is how it's always been
But if nothing has changed...
Then it must mean...
But the sun is cold - the sky is wrong
The stars are black - the night is gone
The world is still - the space is stopped
The time is out - the day is dropped
The house is dark - the room is scarred
The boy is stiff - the bed is hard
The blood is thick - the head is burst
The taste is dry - the kiss is thirst
And it's not the same you
It's not the same you
No it never was like this
It's not the same you
It's not the same you and it never really is
It's not the same you
It's not the same you
No it never was like this
It's not the same you
It's not the same you and it never really is
It's not the same you
It's not the same you
Oh it's not the same
This isn't how it's always been
Everything has to have changed...
Or it's me...

hm one of the songs. nvr heard it but the lyrics are cool. hm. sian.
very tired been up on my fee since 6.
nvr really rested. hai. okok. =)
going out with the gurlies tmr.
shopping ah? haha. take a peek. =/
hai. shit. think i better sleep.
sore throat.. =/ ugh

2004-11-22T21:11:00.000+08:00

its overrrrrr :)
tired tired tired
as always. back is aching
dont know whyy.
ahh. feel so old.
gotta do some work someday man. =/
it erks me to think bout work.
nevermind.
its another boring day.
discussed the decoration.
wahh. it's not easy. shit.
hehe. ohh.
the dress code has changed for wednesday anyway.
it's nice party clothes or nice pleasant clothes.
mrs neo wrote that. sooo... haha.
okayy.hectic day tmr. i cannot believe my luck.
always fcuking suay. hai.
its another down down down dayy.
i dont know what's that supposed to mean but yeah.
short fuse.
hmm. i think the personality disorder quiz is pretty okay.
its not exactly accuratee.. but its truee
to a certain extent.
now you guys know wht a freak i am.
freaking sian laaa. i hate the holidays.
it's like im not here anymore hm.

2004-11-22T15:07:00.000+08:00

Disorder Rating
Paranoid: High
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Moderate
Antisocial: Low
Borderline: Moderate
Histrionic: Low
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: Moderate
Dependent: High
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate

URL of the test: http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mv
URL for more info: http://www.4degreez.com/misc/disorder_information2.html

Paranoid
Paranoid personality disorder is characterized by a distrust of others and a constant suspicion that people around you have sinister motives. People with this disorder tend to have excessive trust in their own knowledge and abilities and usually avoid close relationships with others. They search for hidden meanings in everything and read hostile intentions into the actions of others. They are quick to challenge the loyalties of friends and loved ones and often appear cold and distant to others. They usually shift blame to others and tend to carry long grudges.

Schizoid
People with schizoid personality disorder avoid relationships and do not show much emotion. They genuinely prefer to be alone and do not secretly wish for popularity. They tend to seek jobs that require little social contact. Their social skills are often weak and they do not show a need for attention or acceptance. They are perceived as humorless and distant and often are termed "loners."

Schizotypal
Many believe that schizotypal personality disorder represents mild schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by odd forms of thinking and perceiving, and individuals with this disorder often seek isolation from others. They sometimes believe to have extra sensory ability or that unrelated events relate to them in some important way. They generally engage in eccentric behavior and have difficulty concentrating for long periods of time. Their speech is often over elaborate and difficult to follow.

Antisocial
A common misconception is that antisocial personality disorder refers to people who have poor social skills. The opposite is often the case. Instead, antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of conscience. People with this disorder are prone to criminal behavior, believing that their victims are weak and deserving of being taken advantage of. They tend to lie and steal. Often, they are careless with money and take action without thinking about consequences. They are often agressive and are much more concerned with their own needs than the needs of others.

Borderline
Borderline personality disorder is characterized by mood instability and poor self-image. People with this disorder are prone to constant mood swings and bouts of anger. Often, they will take their anger out on themselves, causing themselves injury. Suicidal threats and actions are not uncommon. They think in very black and white terms and often form intense, conflict-ridden relationships. They are quick to anger when their expectations are not met.

Histrionic
People with histrionic personality disorder are constant attention seekers. They need to be the center of attention all the time, often interrupting others in order to dominate the conversation. They use grandiose language to discribe everyday events and seek constant praise. They may dress provacatively or exaggerate illnesses in order to gain attention. They also tend to exaggerate friendships and relationships, believing that everyone loves them. They are often manipulative.

Narcissistic
Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by self-centeredness. Like histrionic disorder, people with this disorder seek attention and praise. They exaggerate their achievements, expecting others to recongize them as being superior. They tend to be choosy about picking friends, since they believe that not just anyone is worthy of being their friend. They tend to make good first impressions, yet have difficulty maintaining long-lasting relationships. They are generally uninterested in the feelings of others and may take advantage of them.

Avoidant
Avoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social anxiety. People with this disorder often feel inadequate, avoid social situations, and seek out jobs with little contact with others. They are fearful of being rejected and worry about embarassing themselves in front of others. They exaggerate the potential difficulties of new situations to rationalize avoiding them. Often, they will create fantasy worlds to substitute for the real one. Unlike schizoid personality disorder, avoidant people yearn for social relations yet feel they are unable to obtain them. They are frequently depressed and have low self-confidence.

Dependent
Dependent personality disorder is characterized by a need to be taken care of. People with this disorder tend to cling to people and fear losing them. They may become suicidal when a break-up is imminent. They tend to let others make important decisions for them and often jump from relationship to relationship. They often remain in abusive relationships. They are overly sensitive to disapproval. They often feel depressed.

Obsessive-Compulsive
Obsessive- Compulsive personality disorder is similar to obsessive-compulsive anxiety disorder. People with this disorder are overly focused on orderliness and perfection. Their need to do everything "right" often interferes with their productivity. They tend to get caught up in the details and miss the bigger picture. They set unreasonably high standards for themselves and others, and tend to be very critical of others when they do not live up to these high standards. They avoid working in teams, believing others to be too careless or incompetent. They avoid making decisions because they fear making mistakes and are rarely generous with their time or money. They often have difficulty expressing emotion.

2004-11-21T22:36:00.000+08:00

I MISS YOU! :)

2004-11-21T22:17:00.000+08:00

i would say today was a pretty nice day.
no tempers flared or anything. but was darn tired.
the buffet was alright.
sashimi was the best. the desserts were second.
yumyum. then went on to the jigsaw puzzle contest.
we got the 8th position.
haha. no big deal i guess.
i know im nerdy, geeky yeah. anything.
i would prefer if you stop treating me like some little girl. =/
i feel so damn stupid and i wld rather you go find someone esle.
after being missing in action for like 2 years or soo.
bloody hell.
we just belong in different worlds.
it's so difficult even tryin to talk to you. so do me a favour and dissapear?
ok? bleah. anyway. tmr's another hectic day.
i really dont know why my days are like that.
hm. wanna go tanning again.
anyone interested?
ohh. anyone up for the incredibles?
or taxi?
i think im asking the air anyway. bleah. im pessimistic.
wahahaha.stop me.
i keep asking myself. to stay calm.
blah, that's nuts.
ermm. wht esle?
i dont like trainins anymore. i wont need to go for the tourny too.
since i'll be in m'sia anyway. haha.i think?
im gettin lazyyy and fat and frumpy and down and lousy
the Os are (gonna be) over :)
cool. and nxt yr's mee.
dont understand how can you guys NOT freak out. =/
haha. i'll probably need sedatives to keep me calm.
oh boy, now im lame.I'M LAME<-
haha. okayy. ermm. i think i'll go off now.
good luck to those taking DNT and science MCQ.
ALL THE BEST!! ;)
bleah. i feel like crying. for no reason again. =/

2004-11-21T09:10:00.000+08:00

gotta admit;
im cranky.
im unstable.
im mad.
sighh.
and i'll be missin you.

2004-11-21T01:21:00.000+08:00

i feel like such a fucking fool
i mean who i am to think that i was worth it.
yes yes, you might think im turning hysterical, overbearing whtevr i dont know.
yeah, maybe i am.
im turning into some kinda of freak you cant wait to run away from.
i just dont get it.
i feel like fuckin crying.
why am i even so agitated? you might be thinking.
i dont know either. i dont know.
i cant take it.
it's gettin to me even though i know it shouldnt. i cant help it.

2004-11-20T14:43:00.000+08:00

today is feelin fat day. =/
i keep eatin too much again.
someone just cut my supply of food. =x
i'll probably die a horrible death.
there's gonna be a buffet tomorrow!
then some three-generation compeition cum dinner.
it's gonna be fun
just my ah ma, my mum and me.
why i keep bloggin for tmr.
cos today's absolutely boring.
im getting bored of my layout already.
sighh. okay.
wonderin how are you >) im nuts. okay.
off to cook. kill me.

2004-11-19T23:03:00.000+08:00

okay. finally, feel like blogging. =/
it has been hectic these past few days.
i dont stay at home much or im too tired to actually use the com and such.
i dont know. a number of things on my hands now.
its not really a bad thing as it does keeps me occupied
but i feel damn tired. that's for sure.
i keep complaining im tired. =S haha. dont mind me,
if i repeat it over and over again. olinda's out.
its unbelievable, she's not bad - in fact quite good what.
her parents are rich too.hai. singing compeitions are not fair.
especially if its left up to singapore to vote..
hm.just an opinion of mine.
picture of you in my mind* :)

2004-11-18T22:42:00.000+08:00

today has been a day with ups and downs.
the only down must be the crankyness brought about by my sleepyness.
is there even such a word?
went to sch. blah factor. waited stupidly for like half an hour.
plus point. heheh. =x go figure.. lalalala.
hmm. went to tm with melati. walk walk walk.
at first it was fun u know. then it got draggy
and slowly tiring and boring. anyways..
walked at bugis and citilink and marina square and suntec. blahh.
ended up with quite abit of vouchers. hurhur. =/ okok.
went to kallang threatre thereafter.
the director must be some bigshot.
ivan heng went too! mann. shockin.
hai. my sis looks like a teedy bear! hai.
i dont know wht to blog anymore.
i miss you :)

2004-11-16T22:18:00.000+08:00

i just dont feel like blogging these few days.
i feel so suffocated.
nothing i can do to break free.
i cant wait for it to be over.
maybe then.. i can be more free, more sure :)
good nights*

2004-11-15T23:13:00.000+08:00

my tagboard's screwed.
got some meeting tomorrow.
weather sucks

2004-11-14T20:49:00.000+08:00

macadamia nuts, raisins, chocolate chips and cherries within rock buns.

soft succulent meat filling with lettuce wrapped in rice paper-vietnam style

chicken wings, chocolate chip cookies, lotong and jellies!

my aunt's a great cook.

its a great plus she travels all around the world too.

There is a reason why I can't seem to get you* off my mind...

I don't want to :)

2004-11-13T22:51:00.000+08:00

yeahh. maybe i truely suck =(

2004-11-13T11:14:00.000+08:00

im so bored.

2004-11-12T22:53:00.000+08:00

finally! i can post.
my mum jus sat nxt to me for like the past one hour?
i can jus die of boredom. =/
pretending to do other things.
i just cannot stand it la.
then she rambles on and on about senseless things that dont quite concern me.
hai. mothers~ anyway.
TODAY IS THE LAST DAY OF THE EXTRA LESSONS!
wahhaa. no more waking up early in the mornin. at least not tmr!
haha. had training then went to see yanling, agnes and liting bowl.
i have nvr been good in anything thus i decided to give it a miss.
had this urge to jus cry during training
i dont quite know why also.
jus felt so stupid, useless and dumb.
i cant even send the shuttle to the back of the court.
how retared is tht?
worst thing, coach claims that it's the shuttles.
i think it makes no difference. i jus suck.
it was quite fun seeing them play.
they were quite good and sometimes tyco at it.
hais. yanling leaving for shanghai tomorrow.
i think she might still be packing now. haha.
funny. went to run on the treadmill after leaving safra.
stupid rain, if not i would have ran outside.
legs are kinda tired now.
still kinda sunburnt and it's starting to hurt.
bleah, dumb dumb me..
tmr going out with my sis.
maybe get sometimes for ourselves (billabong skirt!) and my mum
her bday's coming soon.
something for ms leong too! haha.
shit. i hate nov sometimes.
i'll be so broke.
havent watched shark take or taxi or princess diaries yet.
yawn* boring i know.
i cant help it. there'll be a meetin on tues
i jus cant wait.
i hope bernard dont mind me on the reception thingy.
dont mind helping till late at night. =)
i keep talkin to myself btw,
might go crazy when i start talkin to myself aloud. haha.
jus to keep my cool,
i might jus turn insane. wahaha.
i miss you*

2004-11-11T20:27:00.000+08:00

im sorta in a good mood today?
i mean of course, my mum and sis were naggin incessantly
but i didnt get pissed or what.
i take it as a good sign.
went tannin.
finally, the sun agreed to let me get alil black.
it hurts alil here and there.
my tummy is like red?! haha. look so darn funny.
tanlines are so obvious too.
going swimming with the gurlies tomorrow also.
after training. man, i jus love the pool nowadays =P
came home, slacked online.
tried to sleep.
then liling called me go chinatown.
hai. sorta glad i didnt jus pierce my ear like tht.
guessed my mum was pretty against it.
hm. had fun with lt and ll today =)
im just so glad.
realised how lucky i am. hai.
okok :)
you take care alrights. seem pretty busy enjoying yourself. :)

2004-11-11T14:06:00.000+08:00

apologies to those who have been following up my blog
for my wilful and childish moodswings
and the ridiculous posts.
i cannot believe myself :(